Pushing the button16 July 2021
Yesterday I finally gave notice to my landlord, and while I have yet to work out an official leaving date in practice I will be gone in just under three weeks time. For at least the last six months my life has been swinging between thinking of rebooting my life, and the despair caused by impediments that had stopped me getting there. With all those impediments gone I can finally tie up all loose ends and prepare for that future.
An unhappy stayIn hindsight my time in this apartment was basically trouble from the word ‘go’, and even though I was paying through the nose for the place I ended up only staying there overnight a touch over half the days I paid for. I sorta somehow kept things together for the first six or so weeks which was when Covid-19 was rally kicking off, but in hindsight about the time I got my deposit back for my previous place was when my mind went over the cliff edge. In short important things got neglected at a critical time and the results would prove life-changing. Since then I have had very little desire to look back and make sense of what happened when, because things I could have done in hindsight were not the things that I was in any fit state to think about.
Looking back it was only really late-summer last year that I have any fond memories of from my total time in the place, and even then that is mostly due to the electronics projects I was typically doing around the time. That was a short period between having made myself some space to actually do stuff so my mind would not go into shut-down like it did a few months earlier, and having to ship stuff back to the UK that I would actually miss having around. I was in the UK for pretty much the three months either side of Christmas, so returning back in March did not feel like coming home.